As divorcing couples search for an easier and somewhat kinder method for resolution, more people have become curious about the benefits of Divorce Without War® mediation and how this kind of process might apply to their unique situation. To help them understand, we’ve compiled a list of advantages of our mediation versus the more traditional and/or litigated divorce process.

 1. LOWER COST

In a Divorce Without War® mediation, willing parties engage in an official process PRIOR to filing a court action. The couple will only pay one professional – the attorney/mediator – versus the expense of hiring two lawyers to take opposing positions in court. Resolution is achieved outside of the courtroom, through discussion and legal settlement based upon terms developed by the participants themselves, eliminating the need for witness subpoenas, court reporter fees and transcript fees typically amassed during divorce proceedings. Prolonged, litigated divorce can deplete assets, entail expensive professional services and interrupt an individual’s personal business, resulting in expenses that may be three times as high – or more – than the cost of Divorce Without War® mediation.

 2. LESS TIME CONSUMING

Participants control how quickly the Divorce Without War® mediation will resolve. The couple determines the schedule and raises issues relevant to their family.  By enabling couples to set the schedule, a mediated result is obtained much faster than in traditional litigation because the case doesn’t rely on the court’s schedule. Additionally, parties do not have to wait for separate meetings and sessions with their individual attorneys, who then take time to speak to each other. Many Divorce Without War® mediators also offer flexible scheduling and appointments in the evenings or on weekends, which can help speed up the process.

 3. PARTIES CONTROL THE OUTCOME

In mediation, the parties reach an agreement developed by the spouses themselves, not one imposed by a third party or  the court system. This is different from litigated divorce, which puts decision-making in the hands of the judge, who may not be familiar with the family’s particular circumstances or needs. Participants are also given the opportunity to try out the terms of their agreement before they become binding,  to see how they work and then propose changes, if needed.

 4. CONFIDENTIALITY

Litigated divorce can be a lengthy process involving depositions of friends, family and business associates, scrutinizing personal activities, finances, and evaluation and criticism of each spouse’s role as a parent. A mediation conference is a private meeting in which the participants are obligated to maintain confidentiality. Clients can discuss important issues in the privacy and comfort of the mediator’s office, rather than in a public courthouse. Additionally, a mediator’s files are confidential – court files are public records that anyone can view.

5. COLLABORATIVE PROCESS

The preservation of relationships is often highly important to divorcing couples, especially when there are children involved.  During the mediation process, the couple will be empowered and guided to communicate about, among other things, his and her concerns, desires, needs, opinions, thoughts and interests. Communication is an essential component of mediation, allowing for the mediator to facilitate a fair agreement. The necessity for communication has often become the “blessing in disguise,” as it may form a nice foundation for the couple, once divorced, to continue the communication that started in mediation.

Divorce Without War allows the opportunity for a once-married couple to look back and to feel proud of his or her conduct, for modeling for their children that when faced with a relationship struggle, they each found a kind way to resolve problems rather than be that parent who declared war on the child’s mom or dad.  The mediation way is one very smart method  that lets the parent protect the health and development of his or her children, the health of precious relationships among family and friends, and the health of the spouse him or herself. Choosing to use Divorce Without War® type mediation results in a kind, dignified process for everyone involved.